Thoughts

With training coming to an end, I can't help but to think about my journey thus far. I can't say that it was smooth sailing as though the wind has always been on my side. But, BMT is definitely my happiest moment throughout the different phases of training.

I have been blessed with dedicated instructors who believed in moulding their soldiers right from the basic. I held on tightly the memories of the 20 of us fighting hard regardless of any challenges. The laughter and the down moments we shared felt like it was just yesterday. Training aside, I am truly glad that I have made friends that will last me for a life time. Friends who did not only fight along with me but friends who actually instructed me throughout my "infant" months.

Anyhow, it was only my days in mids that I experienced the true hardship of naval training. Not so much on the physical component but rather the mental part. I struggled hard to stay alive and my effort paid off. I guess if I really have to pin point on something that I wish I had done better, that would be to start afresh and seriously put in my best to excel and not just to overcome. Easier said than done. Most of the time, I just struggled to meet the deadlines. It came to a point that I almost couldn't take it. I was so near to breaking down. On top of this, there's always the issue of people relationship. Being the only female is not easy. The frequency is never in tune. People became insensitive, on the other hand I got more sensitive and wuahlah.... conflicts.

I just want to be me. Pride, Passion, Positive Attitude, Prestige. Don't doubt and don't question why. I'll do what I am supposed to do. Give a little respect and I will return it to you. Unfortunately, I guess guys will always think that this whole organisation is a bull shit and I have not seen its true side. For whatever reasons they might cite, I have chosen my path and I would very much love to stay as planned.