actually ive got nothing to blog at all. its just that i dislike seeing the same stuff on my blog everyday. so im going to blabber something.
its the first time that i was home early after weeks of attachment at bodynits. kinda miss my mom's cooking. as i was slouching on my brand new sofa watching tv, i truly appreacited the free time that a student has. watching tv was like such an enjoyment. i almost felt like an alien to the remote control. totally lost touch with all the tv programmes. what happened to my favourite desperate housewive, grey's anatomy and lost? oh man... and please dont come to me expecting to have a conversation on singapore idol.
tmr's mid week. something to cheer me up a little.anyway there are many things to cheer me up... all in a line. saturday there's style beach party, lalitha's bday and nus business bash. why am i going nus bash? i think a better question would be how the hell did i manage to be on nus bash vip list. haha. *shrug my shoulders*
THUMPER next tuesday. fuck! how fucking exciting can that be? i'll just get drunk! ok im kidding. i'll make sure that i appear at my small little corner in the office the next day.
yiqi's bday party next friday. time to meet up some friends.
and following thursday... FEMME QUEST. lovely. that's even more exciting. guess what? i've already decided what im going to wear. haha. how freaking crazy. im going to put on my $99 zara top!!! and im going to get this ultra record breaking denim skirt. its a bitchy nite out man! this time round im serious. im fucking going to get myself drunk again. yes AGAIN! so peng you... please get ready. (do i hear xh saying she's reconsidering whether to go or not? haha)
friday... im off. away from singapore to hide myself.
---------
Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
I am a dreamer but when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bear my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
Sunday, June 25, 2006
25th June 06, Sunday 12:48am
its sunday already!!! sob sob sob. my last day of rest. soooooooo sad!
dear friends who bought me zara vouchers, you'd be glad that ive finally used the 1st 2 $50. i bought a strip shirt that costs $99. thank you. absolutely love it to the bits. i like stuff that i can wear to work, to school and to club. ok lets face it... scrap the school part. i like stuff that i can wear to club. yes. once dearie let me have the photo, i'll post it up. you'll see what i mean. for the time being its my favourite shirt! hehe. breaks my $75 mango shirt record.
i think i'll be going back to mango to get my white jacket. cos i cant find any piece that is so fitting than that. $175... i think its worth it lah. can wear to work. and to club too. hahaha...
im getting better after hanging out with dearie for soooooo many days. lets see.. did we go out on monday? i think we did. ya we did. we went gelare on tuesday. we went mos on thursday. went dome lido on friday. went zara just now. and tmr tanning. great.
yes since somebody has got no time for me, and my dearest dearie has all the time on earth for me... you can consider her(my dearie) as my new found girl friend. just that we are in a non-exclusive relationship. haha. ya.. keep it that way k. im very nice to my girl friend even though i have the tendency to side track and pluck wild flowers. ive never ever really sent anyone home... but ive sent dearie home for 2 consecutive days. hell... the journey to her block and from her block to mine aint that short k. not that im complaining but just to let you ppl know how freaking nice i am as a girl friend. hahaha.
im always curious about how others perceive me. as in my ability to attract. ive always wonder why no guys really pick me up on an ordinary day. ordinary mean when im not clubbing. and i got a pretty good answer from dearie.. its because i give the "i cant really be bothered with guys and just not interested" look. which i think is pretty true! hahaha. no wonder. well that said, i wanna give the gay vibe too!!! i mean ya its good that i manage to tell guys in a non-verbal way to stay clear from me, at the same time i wanna attract ppl of my category!!! sigh sigh sigh. ive got this tooooooo freaking straight look. argh. i guess it cant be blamed because unless youre a butch or an andro, ppl will just think that you're straight.
ok im going to bed and be a pig.
dear friends who bought me zara vouchers, you'd be glad that ive finally used the 1st 2 $50. i bought a strip shirt that costs $99. thank you. absolutely love it to the bits. i like stuff that i can wear to work, to school and to club. ok lets face it... scrap the school part. i like stuff that i can wear to club. yes. once dearie let me have the photo, i'll post it up. you'll see what i mean. for the time being its my favourite shirt! hehe. breaks my $75 mango shirt record.
i think i'll be going back to mango to get my white jacket. cos i cant find any piece that is so fitting than that. $175... i think its worth it lah. can wear to work. and to club too. hahaha...
im getting better after hanging out with dearie for soooooo many days. lets see.. did we go out on monday? i think we did. ya we did. we went gelare on tuesday. we went mos on thursday. went dome lido on friday. went zara just now. and tmr tanning. great.
yes since somebody has got no time for me, and my dearest dearie has all the time on earth for me... you can consider her(my dearie) as my new found girl friend. just that we are in a non-exclusive relationship. haha. ya.. keep it that way k. im very nice to my girl friend even though i have the tendency to side track and pluck wild flowers. ive never ever really sent anyone home... but ive sent dearie home for 2 consecutive days. hell... the journey to her block and from her block to mine aint that short k. not that im complaining but just to let you ppl know how freaking nice i am as a girl friend. hahaha.
im always curious about how others perceive me. as in my ability to attract. ive always wonder why no guys really pick me up on an ordinary day. ordinary mean when im not clubbing. and i got a pretty good answer from dearie.. its because i give the "i cant really be bothered with guys and just not interested" look. which i think is pretty true! hahaha. no wonder. well that said, i wanna give the gay vibe too!!! i mean ya its good that i manage to tell guys in a non-verbal way to stay clear from me, at the same time i wanna attract ppl of my category!!! sigh sigh sigh. ive got this tooooooo freaking straight look. argh. i guess it cant be blamed because unless youre a butch or an andro, ppl will just think that you're straight.
ok im going to bed and be a pig.
Saturday, June 24, 2006
24th June 06, Saturday 1:59pm
ever since the morning, while i was still half-consciously asleep, my mom has been playing all the oldies. and you know most oldies are like the lovey dovery kind which totally sinks my heart further. why did they compose so many heart breaking songs back in the 70s? comparing the old ones and the contemplary ones, i prefer the former. i think i can better relate myself to them. oh well... its not important whether you know or not. anyway, whatever on this site is not important at all. its just a space for me to let out my thoughts at the moment. so i might say certain things at certain time, it does not necessarry mean that im serious bout it.
ok this part i mean it:
i enjoy every minute that i spend with dearie. i could blabber on and on.. she understood what i said. there were times when i was tired of talking, when silent sank in, it wasnt weird at all. you know what i mean? it was all so natural. like we could ease ourself, just enjoy the silent between us. whether our minds were far off somewhere.. thinking of jerks or what not. it didnt matter. as long as i know she was there with me.
last night, we walked from lido all the way down to citihall mrt station and took 174 back home. how crazy right? its just me. i love walking, especially when im down. walking keeps my mind off things. sometimes i feel that its purposeful, sometimes not. purposeful when i know where im going, how im getting there. like last night, i needed to show dearie the way around. as though i know alot. but the fact was no i know shit about things. i know shit about places around. i know shit about what i wanna do in life. i just knew that we should get to citihall and take a bus ride home. well at least i feel good at that time.
then there were times when i walk aimlessly. seldom but there were. i walked till my legs ache. then i'll go home and sleep. haha.
i think im beginning to understand why some people make use of others. its because they are so hurt inside, they needed others to give them attention. they needed company. they needed something from others. hence, they would do everything, just to get something from others. if you even know what i mean. that said, it does not mean that i condone such act. im definitely not guilty of such act. at least i lay down the terms. there should be rules even before you start your game. how can one play a boundless game? by the way, i said rules and i mean well defined rules. do not smoke your way through... making all rules so blurry. if that's the case, then what is the point of having rules?
i dont know why she made me say things, which she and i clearly know i dont mean it. not in a million times. sometimes i just feel like going home and sink myself in my bed not doing anything. maybe i should be bolder to tell her what i want, even if i have to hurt her. well not like i havent been hurt before. like hell?! why should i care whether or not others are hurt because of me? i mean, fuck. did those who hurt me ever think of how hurt was i? or how hurt am i? i know its so damn fucking mean of me and totally totally a bitchy act, to talk to her while my mind was off somewhere. it totally sucks. not that i feel guilty of anything. luckily i have my sexy ass well covered when i told her where im coming from. i say it sucks because when i do things like this, it just makes me realise or be more consciously aware of what i truly want
ok this part i mean it:
i enjoy every minute that i spend with dearie. i could blabber on and on.. she understood what i said. there were times when i was tired of talking, when silent sank in, it wasnt weird at all. you know what i mean? it was all so natural. like we could ease ourself, just enjoy the silent between us. whether our minds were far off somewhere.. thinking of jerks or what not. it didnt matter. as long as i know she was there with me.
last night, we walked from lido all the way down to citihall mrt station and took 174 back home. how crazy right? its just me. i love walking, especially when im down. walking keeps my mind off things. sometimes i feel that its purposeful, sometimes not. purposeful when i know where im going, how im getting there. like last night, i needed to show dearie the way around. as though i know alot. but the fact was no i know shit about things. i know shit about places around. i know shit about what i wanna do in life. i just knew that we should get to citihall and take a bus ride home. well at least i feel good at that time.
then there were times when i walk aimlessly. seldom but there were. i walked till my legs ache. then i'll go home and sleep. haha.
i think im beginning to understand why some people make use of others. its because they are so hurt inside, they needed others to give them attention. they needed company. they needed something from others. hence, they would do everything, just to get something from others. if you even know what i mean. that said, it does not mean that i condone such act. im definitely not guilty of such act. at least i lay down the terms. there should be rules even before you start your game. how can one play a boundless game? by the way, i said rules and i mean well defined rules. do not smoke your way through... making all rules so blurry. if that's the case, then what is the point of having rules?
i dont know why she made me say things, which she and i clearly know i dont mean it. not in a million times. sometimes i just feel like going home and sink myself in my bed not doing anything. maybe i should be bolder to tell her what i want, even if i have to hurt her. well not like i havent been hurt before. like hell?! why should i care whether or not others are hurt because of me? i mean, fuck. did those who hurt me ever think of how hurt was i? or how hurt am i? i know its so damn fucking mean of me and totally totally a bitchy act, to talk to her while my mind was off somewhere. it totally sucks. not that i feel guilty of anything. luckily i have my sexy ass well covered when i told her where im coming from. i say it sucks because when i do things like this, it just makes me realise or be more consciously aware of what i truly want
Friday, June 23, 2006
23rd June 06, Friday 5:52pm
im tired. unlike dearie who's a workaholic. she can drown herself in work, i cant. im already so tired. so stress. how can i still continue? i wanna do this right. im scared of failing. and there have been many obstacles on the road. its not easy, not going to be too. i know this is life. this is work. i'll try. i'll push myself harder. im just worried that i'll fail myself, fail those who believe in me.
friends have been telling me that they envy me. i donno... seems like they envy me so much that they look up to me. shu en always tells me during lunch that i've had great times at bodywork. ya i dont deny that. ppl have been really great to me. always offering to help when i needed them to. melissa sounded very impressed with my when i told her bout my project.
i thought byron would pull me out of the project cos i scolded someone on my blog. and the whole issue got so big cos this person spank his inbox, telling him how i dont deserve to handle this project. oh well, byron is really understanding. and im still in this project.
ppl have been telling me that i must stay strong. i must continue to believe that i can do it. cos the execution part is not easy. only when i see the fruit, when i see students wearing our brand, then i'll understand. then i'll feel the success.
at the end of the journey, i'll be the proudest person on earth. just like in a netball game, i'm not going to reserve my energy. im giving it all out. im sick today that's why i didnt go to work. but i'll make it up by drafting out my t&c on sunday.
jia you jia you!
jia you dearie!
friends have been telling me that they envy me. i donno... seems like they envy me so much that they look up to me. shu en always tells me during lunch that i've had great times at bodywork. ya i dont deny that. ppl have been really great to me. always offering to help when i needed them to. melissa sounded very impressed with my when i told her bout my project.
i thought byron would pull me out of the project cos i scolded someone on my blog. and the whole issue got so big cos this person spank his inbox, telling him how i dont deserve to handle this project. oh well, byron is really understanding. and im still in this project.
ppl have been telling me that i must stay strong. i must continue to believe that i can do it. cos the execution part is not easy. only when i see the fruit, when i see students wearing our brand, then i'll understand. then i'll feel the success.
at the end of the journey, i'll be the proudest person on earth. just like in a netball game, i'm not going to reserve my energy. im giving it all out. im sick today that's why i didnt go to work. but i'll make it up by drafting out my t&c on sunday.
jia you jia you!
jia you dearie!
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
21st June 06, Wednesday 11:01pm
ok lah.. shall do something simple to ease my anger. i did this in 2004. was checking my archive for no reason and i came across this..
THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. Janet (most ppl)
2. Chao (my close frens)
3. Dearie (dearie)
THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
1. CooLEjaY (still the same. i use it for all my acc)
2. DreamGal (was like damn fucking long ago)
3. NikeGal (wah this one like antic man)
THREE THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. Bitchy
2. I have fucking good figure. definitely good to fuck. haha.
3. Gorgeous
THREE THINGS YOU DON'T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. fucking too nice to ppl
2. tend to love someone too much
3. my life
THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
1. Chinese
2. Chinese
3. Chinese
THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. i'll lose my mom
2. i'll be fat and unattractive
3. THAT I'LL FUCKING MARRY A GUY, HAVE 3 KIDS AND DIE AT THE AGE OF 81!!! OMFG!
THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. happiness
2. Love, Care and Concern
3. air
THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1. pyjamas
2. panty
3. specs
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS (or artists (at the moment)):
sigh.. im too old for this.. i really cant think of anything.
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS AT PRESENT:
i dont really have a fav one at this point in time. but ive been thinking of songs that remind me of ppl. im just being a sentimental bitch especially now. i heard the radio played "if youre not the one" a few times and reminds me of amelia. then the radio played this damn old song, donno why they even played it (ok maybe its because its class 95) "dream". its by this very androgenous woman.. i think the song is very erotic. and it reminds me of just. argh. luckily and surprisingly, (i know you might be reading) the radio didnt play "this love" cos i'll just faint. but see? the thought of it reminds me of ppl!!!
thank god, the radio didnt play all songs in one day. cos i'll just faint faint faint.
THREE NEW THINGS YOU WANT TO TRY IN THE NEXT 12 MONTHS:
haha... i better not write down. ask me in person.
THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP (love is a given):
1. Honesty
2. quality and quantity time
3. SEX
TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE:
1. I love justina
2. I dont love justina
3. I fucking miss justina
ok that's pretty loserish. but fuck. who cares.
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX (or same) THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
(please... its same sex in case you havent realised)
1. Gentleness/feminity/sensitivity
2. Shoulder
3. Breats (haha..)
THREE THINGS YOU JUST CAN'T DO:
1. I cant stop my love/hate thoughts of her.
2. I cant live w/o friends
3. I cannot not be a bitch (& dont use the word 'fuck')
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
1. Is sex a hobby?
2. Nua-ing with dearie
3. Suntanning
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
omg... dearie you can fill this up for me man.
1. talk to her
2. kiss her
3. bed her.
tah-tah!
THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING:
1. Tai Tai !!!! (that's an all time fav...)
2. i really donno what else i wanna be except a TAI TAI
3. i really really really wanna be a tai tai... ok la maybe a boss of my own
same as 2 years ago.
THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
1. Vernice (I really love this place!)
2. LA (actually i feel like staying there just like the L word)
3. A nice hotel room.
THREE KID'S NAMES:
siao..! who wants a kid?
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
i feel like dying now.
THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. Janet (most ppl)
2. Chao (my close frens)
3. Dearie (dearie)
THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
1. CooLEjaY (still the same. i use it for all my acc)
2. DreamGal (was like damn fucking long ago)
3. NikeGal (wah this one like antic man)
THREE THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. Bitchy
2. I have fucking good figure. definitely good to fuck. haha.
3. Gorgeous
THREE THINGS YOU DON'T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. fucking too nice to ppl
2. tend to love someone too much
3. my life
THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
1. Chinese
2. Chinese
3. Chinese
THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. i'll lose my mom
2. i'll be fat and unattractive
3. THAT I'LL FUCKING MARRY A GUY, HAVE 3 KIDS AND DIE AT THE AGE OF 81!!! OMFG!
THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. happiness
2. Love, Care and Concern
3. air
THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1. pyjamas
2. panty
3. specs
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS (or artists (at the moment)):
sigh.. im too old for this.. i really cant think of anything.
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS AT PRESENT:
i dont really have a fav one at this point in time. but ive been thinking of songs that remind me of ppl. im just being a sentimental bitch especially now. i heard the radio played "if youre not the one" a few times and reminds me of amelia. then the radio played this damn old song, donno why they even played it (ok maybe its because its class 95) "dream". its by this very androgenous woman.. i think the song is very erotic. and it reminds me of just. argh. luckily and surprisingly, (i know you might be reading) the radio didnt play "this love" cos i'll just faint. but see? the thought of it reminds me of ppl!!!
thank god, the radio didnt play all songs in one day. cos i'll just faint faint faint.
THREE NEW THINGS YOU WANT TO TRY IN THE NEXT 12 MONTHS:
haha... i better not write down. ask me in person.
THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP (love is a given):
1. Honesty
2. quality and quantity time
3. SEX
TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE:
1. I love justina
2. I dont love justina
3. I fucking miss justina
ok that's pretty loserish. but fuck. who cares.
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX (or same) THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
(please... its same sex in case you havent realised)
1. Gentleness/feminity/sensitivity
2. Shoulder
3. Breats (haha..)
THREE THINGS YOU JUST CAN'T DO:
1. I cant stop my love/hate thoughts of her.
2. I cant live w/o friends
3. I cannot not be a bitch (& dont use the word 'fuck')
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
1. Is sex a hobby?
2. Nua-ing with dearie
3. Suntanning
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
omg... dearie you can fill this up for me man.
1. talk to her
2. kiss her
3. bed her.
tah-tah!
THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING:
1. Tai Tai !!!! (that's an all time fav...)
2. i really donno what else i wanna be except a TAI TAI
3. i really really really wanna be a tai tai... ok la maybe a boss of my own
same as 2 years ago.
THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
1. Vernice (I really love this place!)
2. LA (actually i feel like staying there just like the L word)
3. A nice hotel room.
THREE KID'S NAMES:
siao..! who wants a kid?
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
i feel like dying now.
21st June 06, Wednesday 10:17pm
im gonna be a mega bitch. so stay clear. if i happen to fire at you, dont complain that i didnt warn you.
first person on the list, this fucking fat asshole with a pair of A cup breasts, fucking ugly. so what if you come with a little bit more wit? how dare you make my dearie upset? i dont fucking care whether you're reading this anot. i just think that you are not a gentleman at all.in fact you are just a coward asshole. and honestly, i think you're out to play her. i really hate guys like you. disgusting pair of A cup breats who only cares what your dick wants. you'll definitely have your days. argh...
irritating. really. i hate it when guys say that girls should have long hair, be fair, be more feminine blah blah blah... dont be vulgar. i think they ought to be back in the olden days like the huan zhu ge ge time. i bet you'll like all the girls on the street. well most of them dont really have a mind of their own. so i guess they will satisfy your ego. then again... sometimes i really wonder how contradicting it can be. cos there are guys who want their girl not to be vulgar but they enjoy hearing them scream "fuck fuck fuck" when they are having orgasm in bed. hmmmmmm....
of cos.. not liking guys doesnt mean that i support everything girls do. cos this fucking person pissed the hell out of me. argh. the thought of her boils my blood. i seriously seriously cant believe that you told my dearie all that. cos it makes me wonder what made you said that. perhaps you were just too confused. argh. i feel like screaming at you. if only i can. but i dont have the energy to. if i see your face, i'd be too put off to even say a word more. your actions and words makes me hate you. stay the hell away.
and this other person. i cant believe that you are soooooooooooo mean. so fucking mean that you were just all out for revenge. it shows how small you are. how fucking small. please next time be smarter do it once, not too many times. the fact that you did it repeatedly, it loses credibility. see what happens now? nobody cares a shit about what you did. and now you've turned into a joke. a mere joke. sigh. stupid asshole. and this is the typical egoistic asshole that wont let matter rest.
------------------
that said, dearie and i read today's straits time horoscope. sigh sigh sigh. it sounds sooooo true. i mean ya... for dearie.. and for mine ive got to wait a few more days and see.
it said something like, i should just listen to myself. though certain things might seem too ideal for me, but it does happen. and follow my body, just do what it wants to.
ok when i read it i only understood the front two lines. cos the last one, though its really direct and easy to inteprete, at that point in time i didnt know what i want until dearie reminded me. yes she had to remind me. haha.. funny.
qoute dearie "your body wants to fuck her, go fuck her lah." hmmm... *roll my eyes* kns.
first person on the list, this fucking fat asshole with a pair of A cup breasts, fucking ugly. so what if you come with a little bit more wit? how dare you make my dearie upset? i dont fucking care whether you're reading this anot. i just think that you are not a gentleman at all.in fact you are just a coward asshole. and honestly, i think you're out to play her. i really hate guys like you. disgusting pair of A cup breats who only cares what your dick wants. you'll definitely have your days. argh...
irritating. really. i hate it when guys say that girls should have long hair, be fair, be more feminine blah blah blah... dont be vulgar. i think they ought to be back in the olden days like the huan zhu ge ge time. i bet you'll like all the girls on the street. well most of them dont really have a mind of their own. so i guess they will satisfy your ego. then again... sometimes i really wonder how contradicting it can be. cos there are guys who want their girl not to be vulgar but they enjoy hearing them scream "fuck fuck fuck" when they are having orgasm in bed. hmmmmmm....
of cos.. not liking guys doesnt mean that i support everything girls do. cos this fucking person pissed the hell out of me. argh. the thought of her boils my blood. i seriously seriously cant believe that you told my dearie all that. cos it makes me wonder what made you said that. perhaps you were just too confused. argh. i feel like screaming at you. if only i can. but i dont have the energy to. if i see your face, i'd be too put off to even say a word more. your actions and words makes me hate you. stay the hell away.
and this other person. i cant believe that you are soooooooooooo mean. so fucking mean that you were just all out for revenge. it shows how small you are. how fucking small. please next time be smarter do it once, not too many times. the fact that you did it repeatedly, it loses credibility. see what happens now? nobody cares a shit about what you did. and now you've turned into a joke. a mere joke. sigh. stupid asshole. and this is the typical egoistic asshole that wont let matter rest.
------------------
that said, dearie and i read today's straits time horoscope. sigh sigh sigh. it sounds sooooo true. i mean ya... for dearie.. and for mine ive got to wait a few more days and see.
it said something like, i should just listen to myself. though certain things might seem too ideal for me, but it does happen. and follow my body, just do what it wants to.
ok when i read it i only understood the front two lines. cos the last one, though its really direct and easy to inteprete, at that point in time i didnt know what i want until dearie reminded me. yes she had to remind me. haha.. funny.
qoute dearie "your body wants to fuck her, go fuck her lah." hmmm... *roll my eyes* kns.
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
20th June 06, Tuesday 11:30pm
sometimes bad things do happen. as for my life, it happens too freaking often. so my solution is, if there's a way to solve it, solve it. on the contrary, if nothing can be done then just don be bothered. hell... what else can i do? well of cos at times i'd be damn frustrated but i just have to live with it. then again, sometimes some people dont see that.
i tried not to be bothered with her. like fuck. was i wrong to call? didnt she said that i could call? i called. she didnt ans. and there wasnt any contact at all for the next few days. what was i supposed to do? i lived my life as usual. but i got worried? like hell? how could someone just disappear like that? even when i called again, the engaged tone was sooooooo weird. dare you say that she was not avoiding me? why didnt she let me know? why? so i was wrong to be concerned even if i was just a friend. i wasnt interogating. it was more like the other way round. its just so fucking frustrating.
i cant be bothered to explain myself. i hate to explain what ive done. cos unlike dearie who understands where im coming from. she knows everything, finshing my sentence even without having me doing so. i mean, if someone really cares, she wouldnt have sent that kinda msg and left it hanging there. it tells alot. so much so that i wish im thinking too wildly. but it seems like its so real.
seriously i cant believe that its happening. ok fuck. who am i kidding. i'm becoming so pro at it that i think i can handle this within a week. oh my god. am i being a cold hearted bitch? cos i think im feeling numb. so numb that i can jump from one sampan to another just like that. whatever. like i really care. ok im just sprouting nonsense. i really do care.
one has to believe in those signs. dont be too stuborn. either you act accordingly or live your life like a fool. no more games.
i'm not going to live in denial. loving her is one thing. living practically is another. that said, im just going to be a real bitch and call this other person.
i tried not to be bothered with her. like fuck. was i wrong to call? didnt she said that i could call? i called. she didnt ans. and there wasnt any contact at all for the next few days. what was i supposed to do? i lived my life as usual. but i got worried? like hell? how could someone just disappear like that? even when i called again, the engaged tone was sooooooo weird. dare you say that she was not avoiding me? why didnt she let me know? why? so i was wrong to be concerned even if i was just a friend. i wasnt interogating. it was more like the other way round. its just so fucking frustrating.
i cant be bothered to explain myself. i hate to explain what ive done. cos unlike dearie who understands where im coming from. she knows everything, finshing my sentence even without having me doing so. i mean, if someone really cares, she wouldnt have sent that kinda msg and left it hanging there. it tells alot. so much so that i wish im thinking too wildly. but it seems like its so real.
seriously i cant believe that its happening. ok fuck. who am i kidding. i'm becoming so pro at it that i think i can handle this within a week. oh my god. am i being a cold hearted bitch? cos i think im feeling numb. so numb that i can jump from one sampan to another just like that. whatever. like i really care. ok im just sprouting nonsense. i really do care.
one has to believe in those signs. dont be too stuborn. either you act accordingly or live your life like a fool. no more games.
i'm not going to live in denial. loving her is one thing. living practically is another. that said, im just going to be a real bitch and call this other person.
Sunday, June 18, 2006
18th June 06, Sunday 12:38pm
i am so so so proud of myself. i managed to survive the 30hrs netball marathon. gosh! it was a hell lot of fucking fun. buahahaha. the first few matches were kinda easy, but as usual i always complained that im tired and exhausted. pushing char to play mid field while i have the luxury to run in that tiny mini semi circle. haha. but what i am most proud of is the last game that we had with this group. ya you ppl who played should know. as i was too mother-fucking pissed with what happened the night before, i decided to rant every ounce of energy i had into the game. no more mere shooter for me. i decided to take up the role as center! impressive isnt it? almost eight years of netball never had i tried that scary position, this morning i was just so on about it. well maybe i was just too fucking insane. considering the fact that i didnt have much sleep. as the games were on going throughout the night at plaza sing. anyway i just pia whatever i can. run run and run. hands always up whenever possible. trying my best to intimidate my opponents. oh... as though playing center was not enough for me, i took up the defender job for awhile. haha. am truly amazed with myself. i hadnt felt this good for such a long time since sec sch. i was always the lazy one. hate to run too much. always psychoing myself that i need to reserve energy for the next couple of min. so i don bother to lift my legs up in the semi circle. i dont bother to raise my hands to pressure my defender cos i always think that its just pretty useless kinda pose. (perhaps just to look a bit more into the game) and i dont really dash up for balls. my fav--> right hand raises and shout "lai" indicating a lop to the back. haha.
but this morning game was 0h-my-fucking-god kinda good. i dashed a few times (hey xh i run leh...too bad you werent there.). adreline shot up my spine when i managed to intercept a ball!!!! my my my... that was HOT! if i have to use a crude way to express the feeling it would be just like having orgasm on court. me? intercept such a nice pass? how can? but i did. i managed to cover a few of my oponents' passes which totally changed my impression of raising hands to pose. haha. ya. totally. so next time i'll pose more often. and i realised that if i put in my whole heart to play, with no reserve at all i can see my potential once again. i feel the yeah-hell-im-good-afterall.
the lethargy and sweat made me forget the numbness that was in me.
anyway... girls nice playing with you all. really nice. next month k. looking forward to that. with xh somemore.
this 30hr marathon event was toturing too. can anyone believe that we couldnt bathe for almost a day? as for my case, its like not bathing for more than a day! what's worse was i had to use mr. T. kns. luckily i used mr. T so its not so uncomfortable and yeaky. and besides being SD, sleep deprived too dearie. especially when i wanted to take a nap and this other person on the phone kept insisting that i talked to her. kns. but of cos how could i not be tempted to? hiak hiak.
im just in a mix of emotion. at times when i really spend time thinking about her, i feel so upset and empty. at other times, i figure that there are just too many other things that are worth me being happy with. like hanging out with friends and playing netball. though i was insanely crying there, i did have fun with those girls. what an irony. but whatever.
call me cynical or skeptical... i just dont believe in this whole L word anymore. i mean L for LOVE not for anything else, especially that 7 letter one. i think im not ready to be in a too committed relationship either. i hate the guessing game and im tired of it. why cant people just have fun while they are together? hang out with each other, enjoy the company and not think about growing old with one another. perhaps a non-exclusive relationship suits the picture better. or rather, in this case, no relationship at all.
afterall im still young and i can safely say that i still can afford the youth and time. why waste investing my time on one person and then have that fucking idiot breaks my heart into million pieces? nah. not my cuppa tea anymore. wait till im near being old enough, when i can sense that i am losing my power of attraction, i'll find a lao butch (in this case definitely not jy, since she's happily att)or a fucking old impotent man with lotsa lotsa lotsa $$$ to spare. i'd be his nurse. purely just nurse. hahaha. maybe everyday i'll just add a dose of "lao shu yao" haha. whatever lah. im just out of my mind. the result of not sleeping for more than 24hrs.
how how dearie? im so crazy now. everything is driving me insane. pls inject some sanity back into my body can?
but this morning game was 0h-my-fucking-god kinda good. i dashed a few times (hey xh i run leh...too bad you werent there.). adreline shot up my spine when i managed to intercept a ball!!!! my my my... that was HOT! if i have to use a crude way to express the feeling it would be just like having orgasm on court. me? intercept such a nice pass? how can? but i did. i managed to cover a few of my oponents' passes which totally changed my impression of raising hands to pose. haha. ya. totally. so next time i'll pose more often. and i realised that if i put in my whole heart to play, with no reserve at all i can see my potential once again. i feel the yeah-hell-im-good-afterall.
the lethargy and sweat made me forget the numbness that was in me.
anyway... girls nice playing with you all. really nice. next month k. looking forward to that. with xh somemore.
this 30hr marathon event was toturing too. can anyone believe that we couldnt bathe for almost a day? as for my case, its like not bathing for more than a day! what's worse was i had to use mr. T. kns. luckily i used mr. T so its not so uncomfortable and yeaky. and besides being SD, sleep deprived too dearie. especially when i wanted to take a nap and this other person on the phone kept insisting that i talked to her. kns. but of cos how could i not be tempted to? hiak hiak.
im just in a mix of emotion. at times when i really spend time thinking about her, i feel so upset and empty. at other times, i figure that there are just too many other things that are worth me being happy with. like hanging out with friends and playing netball. though i was insanely crying there, i did have fun with those girls. what an irony. but whatever.
call me cynical or skeptical... i just dont believe in this whole L word anymore. i mean L for LOVE not for anything else, especially that 7 letter one. i think im not ready to be in a too committed relationship either. i hate the guessing game and im tired of it. why cant people just have fun while they are together? hang out with each other, enjoy the company and not think about growing old with one another. perhaps a non-exclusive relationship suits the picture better. or rather, in this case, no relationship at all.
afterall im still young and i can safely say that i still can afford the youth and time. why waste investing my time on one person and then have that fucking idiot breaks my heart into million pieces? nah. not my cuppa tea anymore. wait till im near being old enough, when i can sense that i am losing my power of attraction, i'll find a lao butch (in this case definitely not jy, since she's happily att)or a fucking old impotent man with lotsa lotsa lotsa $$$ to spare. i'd be his nurse. purely just nurse. hahaha. maybe everyday i'll just add a dose of "lao shu yao" haha. whatever lah. im just out of my mind. the result of not sleeping for more than 24hrs.
how how dearie? im so crazy now. everything is driving me insane. pls inject some sanity back into my body can?
Friday, June 16, 2006
16th June 06, Friday 11:56pm
i am so so tired. thanx dearie for telling me that you wanna go home. if not i wouldnt have known that im actually this tired. haha. anyway it was really a good dinner with ting ting and dearie. i am still not over the part whereby you told me how you remember the relationship i had with amelia. it was super hilarious. god! i didnt know that! ok not that i didnt, i just dont remember and i have absolutely no idea why she told you that!
anyhow... i was almost this close to being convinced by you to call jus. missing her is one thing but what you said did make sense. sigh. i guess im just not too ready to deal with her. somehow this major part in me keeps anticipating all the answers that she would give me. so.. i guess for the time being i shall not deal with it until i am done with all my work and worries.
sometimes i wish that she'll read my blog. however, sad to say that she's not a computer person. she doesnt like surfing the net or blog hopping. she's not even the msn kind. the only thing that she does when she's online is read stupid jokes. other than that... i think she prefers playing with her cats or watching tv. so she'll never find out what im bitching behind her back. haha.
nonetheless, ting, really appreciate the advise. i might just call her tmr.
anyhow... i was almost this close to being convinced by you to call jus. missing her is one thing but what you said did make sense. sigh. i guess im just not too ready to deal with her. somehow this major part in me keeps anticipating all the answers that she would give me. so.. i guess for the time being i shall not deal with it until i am done with all my work and worries.
sometimes i wish that she'll read my blog. however, sad to say that she's not a computer person. she doesnt like surfing the net or blog hopping. she's not even the msn kind. the only thing that she does when she's online is read stupid jokes. other than that... i think she prefers playing with her cats or watching tv. so she'll never find out what im bitching behind her back. haha.
nonetheless, ting, really appreciate the advise. i might just call her tmr.
16th June 06, Friday 11:43pm
Dear Janet,
First of all, I sincerely apologise for being late for the meeting as I was not familiar with the area plus I was held up for a while at the security gantry and the reception. I'm sorry about this and should have apologised earlier.
With regards to the camp proposal that you mentioned in your email thread at the bottom, I was not sure how that tied in with your previous email about communicating through mass emailing. As such I replied back to clarify what were the deliverables from our side but did not get a reply. Previously, my discussions with Renjie (Stacey's friend) was that you all were looking for student leaders and that was what I got from your earlier emails too, that we might even be recommending some. However, the focus changed to that of getting students across the board and I changed over to that. For one, leaving the School of Information Systems out of the picture was not going to be easy as it would be blatant discrimination of the SIS students.
Next, you mentioned over our tele-communication that you wanted to talk about the camps and the various dates, etc. As such, I brought my laptop for the meeting as the dates for all the various camps as well as the university-wide events taking place around this time were all on it. I was about to open it to load all the exact dates as well as some details and contact points but you decided to do without the school camps in the picture and instead focus on the main camp. As such, I felt that the laptop was not needed anymore.
I understand that you might be wondering about why I did not give you definite answers for the various deliverables at the camp on our side. First and foremost, I explained to you I was not involved in the camp organizing committee and it would not have been fair or right for me to make decisions on their behalf. As you mentioned, they already had their program more or less planned out and a skit or announcement will depend on whether it can be accomodated in. Secondly, as you know, I am the President of the SMU Students' Association. Would it be correct for me to make empty promises to external parties or worse still, important corporates such as Bods.Bodynits in this case? It would definitely be wrong to promise and agree to everything that you raised only to later go back on my word or reverse my decision. Whatever I could see possible and feasible on the spot, I had already agreed to at the meeting. I hope you understand that SMU has her own constraints, being in a new environment and still settling in, and definitely not as well-established nor having long histories and illustrious backgrounds like NUS and NTU.
Notwithstanding SMU's age in comparison with other universities, our target audience is also smaller as we have a smaller intake of students. Our current student population stands at 4000 while we are looking at 1200 freshmen joining us this year. Naturally, our camp size will be comparatively less as compared to other varsities which have populations around 20000 and are looking at incoming batches that can eclipse SMU's current population easily. It is definitely not fair to draw comparisons among the different camps.
Finally, I'm sorry if I have come across as arrogant when I requested for your proposal. I was actually thinking of having a contract between us so that there will be commitment on both of our parts. Nevertheless, it should have come from SMU's side and what I needed was your requirements from my side which I thank you for listing out as below. As agreed, I will be getting the camp proposal from the organizing committee (which is already done up).
Sorry again if I have offended you in any way and I hope you see where I'm coming from in this email.
Regards,
Tio Shu Hao, Timothy
______________________________
Dear Timothy,
I can see that news travel far more efficiently than i thought it can. Not that it is meant to be spread as i clearly have no idea smu ppl will be reading(none the less, i was ranting my frustration, i hope you understand that). Having said that, i hope it does not sour the collaboration that we could have.
I see that both you and i have a clear miscommunication. Allow me to clearify my part. This ambassador programme aims to target the whole smu cohort (i know i've stated 3 schools in the first place, now that you have brought up the case of "discriminating" the other school, i would be more than gladly to include that particular school.). I intended for the whole cohort of students to be involved as i do not want it to be just restricted to the clubs members as this programme is planned for the students in each targeted school.
I acknowledge that perhaps smu runs her system differently as compared to ntu and nus. thus, it is so wrong on my part to assume that i could get things done by going through the same procedure. that said, i am willing to accommodate and work with you, that is if you're still interested.
I look forward to work with smu. Seek your reply soon.
PS: if you do not mind, i'd like to post this email up to "clear" your name because of my rash act and also to prevent the start of any verbal war between the varsities that are involved. Thanx.
Regards,
Janet.
First of all, I sincerely apologise for being late for the meeting as I was not familiar with the area plus I was held up for a while at the security gantry and the reception. I'm sorry about this and should have apologised earlier.
With regards to the camp proposal that you mentioned in your email thread at the bottom, I was not sure how that tied in with your previous email about communicating through mass emailing. As such I replied back to clarify what were the deliverables from our side but did not get a reply. Previously, my discussions with Renjie (Stacey's friend) was that you all were looking for student leaders and that was what I got from your earlier emails too, that we might even be recommending some. However, the focus changed to that of getting students across the board and I changed over to that. For one, leaving the School of Information Systems out of the picture was not going to be easy as it would be blatant discrimination of the SIS students.
Next, you mentioned over our tele-communication that you wanted to talk about the camps and the various dates, etc. As such, I brought my laptop for the meeting as the dates for all the various camps as well as the university-wide events taking place around this time were all on it. I was about to open it to load all the exact dates as well as some details and contact points but you decided to do without the school camps in the picture and instead focus on the main camp. As such, I felt that the laptop was not needed anymore.
I understand that you might be wondering about why I did not give you definite answers for the various deliverables at the camp on our side. First and foremost, I explained to you I was not involved in the camp organizing committee and it would not have been fair or right for me to make decisions on their behalf. As you mentioned, they already had their program more or less planned out and a skit or announcement will depend on whether it can be accomodated in. Secondly, as you know, I am the President of the SMU Students' Association. Would it be correct for me to make empty promises to external parties or worse still, important corporates such as Bods.Bodynits in this case? It would definitely be wrong to promise and agree to everything that you raised only to later go back on my word or reverse my decision. Whatever I could see possible and feasible on the spot, I had already agreed to at the meeting. I hope you understand that SMU has her own constraints, being in a new environment and still settling in, and definitely not as well-established nor having long histories and illustrious backgrounds like NUS and NTU.
Notwithstanding SMU's age in comparison with other universities, our target audience is also smaller as we have a smaller intake of students. Our current student population stands at 4000 while we are looking at 1200 freshmen joining us this year. Naturally, our camp size will be comparatively less as compared to other varsities which have populations around 20000 and are looking at incoming batches that can eclipse SMU's current population easily. It is definitely not fair to draw comparisons among the different camps.
Finally, I'm sorry if I have come across as arrogant when I requested for your proposal. I was actually thinking of having a contract between us so that there will be commitment on both of our parts. Nevertheless, it should have come from SMU's side and what I needed was your requirements from my side which I thank you for listing out as below. As agreed, I will be getting the camp proposal from the organizing committee (which is already done up).
Sorry again if I have offended you in any way and I hope you see where I'm coming from in this email.
Regards,
Tio Shu Hao, Timothy
______________________________
Dear Timothy,
I can see that news travel far more efficiently than i thought it can. Not that it is meant to be spread as i clearly have no idea smu ppl will be reading(none the less, i was ranting my frustration, i hope you understand that). Having said that, i hope it does not sour the collaboration that we could have.
I see that both you and i have a clear miscommunication. Allow me to clearify my part. This ambassador programme aims to target the whole smu cohort (i know i've stated 3 schools in the first place, now that you have brought up the case of "discriminating" the other school, i would be more than gladly to include that particular school.). I intended for the whole cohort of students to be involved as i do not want it to be just restricted to the clubs members as this programme is planned for the students in each targeted school.
I acknowledge that perhaps smu runs her system differently as compared to ntu and nus. thus, it is so wrong on my part to assume that i could get things done by going through the same procedure. that said, i am willing to accommodate and work with you, that is if you're still interested.
I look forward to work with smu. Seek your reply soon.
PS: if you do not mind, i'd like to post this email up to "clear" your name because of my rash act and also to prevent the start of any verbal war between the varsities that are involved. Thanx.
Regards,
Janet.
Thursday, June 15, 2006
15th June 06, Thursday 9:52pm
SMU student association's president sucks!
listen all smu students, u might wanna rethink your vote the next time.
late for appoint w/o appology. no proposal or what so ever when he was instructed to bring one. bring a fucking laptop, donno for wat!!! definitely see no sincerity in him. fucking asshole.
so what if you know im an intern. you might wanna check again who's in charged of the project. not all companies do not give authority to their interns for their work. PLUS!!! he wants me to liaise with him but seems like he cant make a fucking single decision on the spot at all. you call that a president?! i have marketing in charged from NUS FASS and SCHOOL OF BUSINESS, telling me yes we can we can we can... we'd do blah blah blah... even my own NTU ya ya... we can we can.. we'll match up to NUS.. blah blah blah... FUCKING SMU. SO WHAT IF URE IN TOWN? SO WAT? you can fucking isolate yourself in town! if a president cant fucking make a decision, what can the rest do? i almost felt like diaoing him cos basically he just acted like a middleman... "i'll have to go back and talk to my people" PUI!
this kinda ppl "de zui" others w/o knowing lo. i can fucking tell you ppl, i gave super good deal to both NUS and NTU lor... when it came to him... i just couldnt be bothered. the most, im just going to give $10vouchers to his goodie bags. that's it. done. PLUS NOT LIKE SMU CAN DO ALOT OF PUBLICITY FOR ME! they suck lah. their camp also lor. perhaps because they dont have proposal that's why. but then again... i know how good ntu business and sports camp can be. and i talked to nus fass and sob ppl, they really sounded very enthusiastic... and the number of ppl they are targetting is better than smu.
that so call president has got fucking myopic vision of doing business. still dare to tell ppl he's in business course! i say i'd like to look at your freshmen orientation camp, and he just told me bout it. nothing else. ppl from ntu and nus are like... "THESE ARE ALL OUR EVENTS...maybe we can work something out of this blah blah blah blah...."
PISSED THE HELL OUT OF ME.
because of that, i'm soooooooo going to tell andre in future, any smu clubs approach us, we are not going to entertain. if you think so what? its only bods.bodynits. wait till you see. i'm sorry that we are very well connected to all publications, fashion stylists, saloons, model agencies etc. i see how u wanna find good sponsorship for your pageant event or what not.
oh ya... u wanna know how fucking arrogant that president is?
he asked me to give him my proposal!
like hell?!
u asked a company to give you its proposal when they want to sponsor you your camp?
think again.
ure talking about 1300 goodie bags. i give $10 vouchers that will be a total of $13 000.
and u dare to asked me to give you MY PROPOSAL BECAUSE I WANT TO SPEND $13 000 ON YOU?! on top of that, i'm giving your fellow schoolmates opportunities to be in the limelight and get sponsored by my company!
SMU... i'm sorry that you have such a president. pls do tell your fellow schoolmates to reevaluate his ability.
listen all smu students, u might wanna rethink your vote the next time.
late for appoint w/o appology. no proposal or what so ever when he was instructed to bring one. bring a fucking laptop, donno for wat!!! definitely see no sincerity in him. fucking asshole.
so what if you know im an intern. you might wanna check again who's in charged of the project. not all companies do not give authority to their interns for their work. PLUS!!! he wants me to liaise with him but seems like he cant make a fucking single decision on the spot at all. you call that a president?! i have marketing in charged from NUS FASS and SCHOOL OF BUSINESS, telling me yes we can we can we can... we'd do blah blah blah... even my own NTU ya ya... we can we can.. we'll match up to NUS.. blah blah blah... FUCKING SMU. SO WHAT IF URE IN TOWN? SO WAT? you can fucking isolate yourself in town! if a president cant fucking make a decision, what can the rest do? i almost felt like diaoing him cos basically he just acted like a middleman... "i'll have to go back and talk to my people" PUI!
this kinda ppl "de zui" others w/o knowing lo. i can fucking tell you ppl, i gave super good deal to both NUS and NTU lor... when it came to him... i just couldnt be bothered. the most, im just going to give $10vouchers to his goodie bags. that's it. done. PLUS NOT LIKE SMU CAN DO ALOT OF PUBLICITY FOR ME! they suck lah. their camp also lor. perhaps because they dont have proposal that's why. but then again... i know how good ntu business and sports camp can be. and i talked to nus fass and sob ppl, they really sounded very enthusiastic... and the number of ppl they are targetting is better than smu.
that so call president has got fucking myopic vision of doing business. still dare to tell ppl he's in business course! i say i'd like to look at your freshmen orientation camp, and he just told me bout it. nothing else. ppl from ntu and nus are like... "THESE ARE ALL OUR EVENTS...maybe we can work something out of this blah blah blah blah...."
PISSED THE HELL OUT OF ME.
because of that, i'm soooooooo going to tell andre in future, any smu clubs approach us, we are not going to entertain. if you think so what? its only bods.bodynits. wait till you see. i'm sorry that we are very well connected to all publications, fashion stylists, saloons, model agencies etc. i see how u wanna find good sponsorship for your pageant event or what not.
oh ya... u wanna know how fucking arrogant that president is?
he asked me to give him my proposal!
like hell?!
u asked a company to give you its proposal when they want to sponsor you your camp?
think again.
ure talking about 1300 goodie bags. i give $10 vouchers that will be a total of $13 000.
and u dare to asked me to give you MY PROPOSAL BECAUSE I WANT TO SPEND $13 000 ON YOU?! on top of that, i'm giving your fellow schoolmates opportunities to be in the limelight and get sponsored by my company!
SMU... i'm sorry that you have such a president. pls do tell your fellow schoolmates to reevaluate his ability.
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
13th June 06, Tuesday 11:25pm
Every morning when i go to work, i thank god that i am given this great opportunity to learn and experience. every evening when i go home, i'll pray that she's screwed, that she knocks her hear against the wall and get a baluku or kick her toes against the door so hard that her toe nail becomes like mine. or the best one... has bad hair everyday.
that aside, i wanna thank god for blessing me with dearie. you know me the best.. like what im going through. family work and what else. i'm greatful that i have you to do crazy things with. to be a crazy woman crapping as though i know a shit about what i'm saying. thank you for always being so spontaneous to entertain me. cant imagine what's it like to be you. i know... i can be very crazy. saying stuff like making my own name cards using those voucher papers. or being thick skin telling ppl "wait till you know bout my fantasy" loudly in a crowded train. i'm sure you dont wanna know. then again, i can assure you that its very entertaining and juicy(hmmm... literally). i can be pretty good at describing every single details... haha. but of cos i'm sure you're better. hahahahahaha....
see what i mean... im really out of my mind. this job is driving me insane. at this rate, i can foresee myself being mad very soon. and poor you have to tolerate my nonsense till your australia trip. damn... am fucking envious.
sigh... work... i'm having a love/hate relationship with that.
pls pray that i dont blabber my fantasy to those 3 ppl that im meeting tmr. hahaha... nah i wont... but if there's any lessie... i might stroke her legs undertable... hahaha... ok my crap is starting again.
Janet janet.... when there's no channel for her to let out... she goes all crazy...
that aside, i wanna thank god for blessing me with dearie. you know me the best.. like what im going through. family work and what else. i'm greatful that i have you to do crazy things with. to be a crazy woman crapping as though i know a shit about what i'm saying. thank you for always being so spontaneous to entertain me. cant imagine what's it like to be you. i know... i can be very crazy. saying stuff like making my own name cards using those voucher papers. or being thick skin telling ppl "wait till you know bout my fantasy" loudly in a crowded train. i'm sure you dont wanna know. then again, i can assure you that its very entertaining and juicy(hmmm... literally). i can be pretty good at describing every single details... haha. but of cos i'm sure you're better. hahahahahaha....
see what i mean... im really out of my mind. this job is driving me insane. at this rate, i can foresee myself being mad very soon. and poor you have to tolerate my nonsense till your australia trip. damn... am fucking envious.
sigh... work... i'm having a love/hate relationship with that.
pls pray that i dont blabber my fantasy to those 3 ppl that im meeting tmr. hahaha... nah i wont... but if there's any lessie... i might stroke her legs undertable... hahaha... ok my crap is starting again.
Janet janet.... when there's no channel for her to let out... she goes all crazy...
Monday, June 12, 2006
12th June 06, Monday 11:34pm
i hate to sound like a loser... but if i dont shout out now... i might just collapse at anytime.
Work is fucking stressful as each day passes by. never had i thought that it would be this hard. i mean before attachment i was mentally prepared that i'd get shit work. data entry, preparing coffee, filing, photocopying and what not. However, it turned out to be surprising good. ya.. i was ,in fact i still am, happy that i'm given the opportunity to learn and take on responsibility. you know big projects (ok maybe to my gm its a minor one....) solely handle by myself. the first 5 weeks were heavenly good. no pressure... did my proposal, my time plan...i even had time to do other stuff like more vouchers printing and a couple of fashion show script. BUT today!!!!! unfortunately i'm starting to panic! it seems like i cant handle everything. the more i think about it, the more things that i do... the more i'm into exercuting this whole project... I'M STARTING TO DOUBT MYSELF! i'm beginning to feel that i'm not up to my gm's standard. in fact i'm like falling below expectation. oh fuck. the whole copy-writing is killing me. i really tried!!! like fucking whole day i've been on it. in the end... i still have markings all over it! i mean fuck lah... i dont wish to be entering the room and coming out knowing that i have to redo the whole god damn thing again. i want to nail it right! get an approval from my gm and perhaps him being impressed with my work. why cant i just think?! be more detailed with my work. think further than just what i have on hands. like fuck fuck fuck.
i know interns are supposed to learn. but i dont wanna feel like im sucking everything from them. i wanna contribute. i want this programme to kick off in a real glamorous way. i sense that byron really want this thing to be big. i've got my launch party waiting for me to plan. but i'm still doing my poster copy writing and i'm supposed to be meeting those marketing ppl on wednesday. i have nothing concrete on hand to present. not like they know anything.... on the other hand i bet they'll be impressed that a ntu intern is assigned to be in charge of this fantastic programme (*holding ntu flag high* like what geraldine said).... fuck........ the more i think about it... the scarier it gets.
can anybody understand?! screw those projects that we have in school. they are like so fucking kiddy as compared to this. remember the stupid xbox 360 launch thing? you think its so easy??? just come up with various creative ways to create hype? ya... like real!!!! you wait long long. wait till the cow jumps over the moon...
but... if i nail this fucking project, i'd be shaking my tush on a table. Just imagine... students in all the unis, ntu,nus and smu... talking about it.. aspiring to be one. and when i walk around in ntu, as a final year student. my dear juniors will be ohhing and ahhing pointing at me in envy. cos i'm the sole person in charged for this whole event.. of cos... you can always argue it in the totally opposite way. sigh.
whatever it is. i'll try to stay positive. cos only this way can i be creative and continue to push myself to do better. if i cant be in the academic dean's list, let me be in the attachment dean's list pls. haha.
on a totally different issue, screw that person. really screw her. screw her upside down inside out, outside in. whatever ways you want. im so fucking tired.
Work is fucking stressful as each day passes by. never had i thought that it would be this hard. i mean before attachment i was mentally prepared that i'd get shit work. data entry, preparing coffee, filing, photocopying and what not. However, it turned out to be surprising good. ya.. i was ,in fact i still am, happy that i'm given the opportunity to learn and take on responsibility. you know big projects (ok maybe to my gm its a minor one....) solely handle by myself. the first 5 weeks were heavenly good. no pressure... did my proposal, my time plan...i even had time to do other stuff like more vouchers printing and a couple of fashion show script. BUT today!!!!! unfortunately i'm starting to panic! it seems like i cant handle everything. the more i think about it, the more things that i do... the more i'm into exercuting this whole project... I'M STARTING TO DOUBT MYSELF! i'm beginning to feel that i'm not up to my gm's standard. in fact i'm like falling below expectation. oh fuck. the whole copy-writing is killing me. i really tried!!! like fucking whole day i've been on it. in the end... i still have markings all over it! i mean fuck lah... i dont wish to be entering the room and coming out knowing that i have to redo the whole god damn thing again. i want to nail it right! get an approval from my gm and perhaps him being impressed with my work. why cant i just think?! be more detailed with my work. think further than just what i have on hands. like fuck fuck fuck.
i know interns are supposed to learn. but i dont wanna feel like im sucking everything from them. i wanna contribute. i want this programme to kick off in a real glamorous way. i sense that byron really want this thing to be big. i've got my launch party waiting for me to plan. but i'm still doing my poster copy writing and i'm supposed to be meeting those marketing ppl on wednesday. i have nothing concrete on hand to present. not like they know anything.... on the other hand i bet they'll be impressed that a ntu intern is assigned to be in charge of this fantastic programme (*holding ntu flag high* like what geraldine said).... fuck........ the more i think about it... the scarier it gets.
can anybody understand?! screw those projects that we have in school. they are like so fucking kiddy as compared to this. remember the stupid xbox 360 launch thing? you think its so easy??? just come up with various creative ways to create hype? ya... like real!!!! you wait long long. wait till the cow jumps over the moon...
but... if i nail this fucking project, i'd be shaking my tush on a table. Just imagine... students in all the unis, ntu,nus and smu... talking about it.. aspiring to be one. and when i walk around in ntu, as a final year student. my dear juniors will be ohhing and ahhing pointing at me in envy. cos i'm the sole person in charged for this whole event.. of cos... you can always argue it in the totally opposite way. sigh.
whatever it is. i'll try to stay positive. cos only this way can i be creative and continue to push myself to do better. if i cant be in the academic dean's list, let me be in the attachment dean's list pls. haha.
on a totally different issue, screw that person. really screw her. screw her upside down inside out, outside in. whatever ways you want. im so fucking tired.
Sunday, June 11, 2006
11th June 06, Sunday 9:29pm
i think its really nice. the only flaw would be that its a bit too low.
nice little cute butterfly. dont you think so. dearie has become a bad girl.. first she's always going out... not home until late in the middle of the night. now she's getting a tattoo?!
chiobus in red and shocking pink bikinis! dont you just love them? i mean both the bikinis and girls. haha
i'm changing my look a little. am tired of trying to spike up my hair when its long. so a hair band to give me the ever so girly look. btw i dont like my smile. ewww... the braces are cutting my lips.
check out dearie... the newpaper girl. haha.
once again us!
move your eyes higher! i know where you're looking at!
dearie and i. the day that we had the climbing over the fence adventure! haha.
dearie said i should join fhm... ya... wait till i cut down on my tummy and when my braces are off. i'd give it a thought.
my my... dont you just love us? fucking gorgeous in our new shades. dearie has the rich princess look while i'm going with the taitai look (what else man). i aspire to be one.
btw we were sun tanning at jurong east. simply love this photo. the sun ray and everything is just perfect.
saturday is our tanning day. i'm going to get more bikinis. haha. i still have one more pink pockadots bikini that i havent taken photo with. hmmm... i'll wear that for style mag beach party. hehe.
11th June 06, Sunday 12:37pm
ok i'll take back what i said about femme quest. turned out that pearlyn was not as great as i think she is. a little disappointed. nonetheless i enjoyed myself on thursday night. char was right. pearlyn is just photogenic. in reality, she's this short little bimbotic chic.
on the other hand, this girl, aya, wow... she's unbelievably good looking. ok not THAT good looking. but i think she has a high chance of winning. at least she's not a bimbo. she has the figure, the face and the personality too. i think i heard her saying that she's from the national women soccer team. how cool.
then there's this big neh neh. omg. she's freaking huge that this girl, daphne, behind us kept saying, "fuck! fuck! how can they have such huge boobs." haha. let me tell you how gigantic they were. i think they can squash your head and suffocate you. haha. nah i'm just exagerating. but during the swim wear parade, i think her breasts are so huge that she cant wear the normal triangular bikini cos it will not be able to give her the support if she had worn that. so she had to put on the tube kind. but when she was walking down the walkway, it was so obvious that her boobs were jiggling with each step that she took. know why? she wore a size smaller. when she reached the front stage and made a turn, my gosh! below the tube, part of her boobs were out. and ya... of cos jingling too. i dont think she purposely chose a smaller swim suit. it was really awful. ppl like us standing in front were laughing and pointing.... i mean why would you want that sort of attention rite? i mean... ya big boobs are great. attractive and seductive... (of cos they have to be rite?) but make sure you choose the right bikini and be able to wear it off... know what i mean? there's this other section whereby they had to parade some casual wear, this girl was really hot. cos she wore this bright bra inside and some sort of a jacket over it... not zipping the whole thing up.. revealing the bra and of cos her cleavage... i thought that was hot. even the butch behind me thought so too. see what i mean? you really need to get the right size of bikini and the right cut.
then this other pathetic girl... sigh. her name is serene. if im not wrong she's still having zero vote now. cant walk cant dance cant do a thing. the worst thing was that she seemed to have no friends to support her. poor thing. and ya... she wore this pair of huge heels that she coudnt walk properly down the walkway... she looked like a duckling wobbling her way lah. aiyo....
done with the bitching thing....
i'm fucking excited that i have a hand size tattoo on my back. wuahahahahaha... dearie chose a nice little butterfly... or rather i was the one who chose it for her. told her not to go for those normal looking one... this butterfly is a bit different. its slightly tilted to one side... i'll post up the photos once dearie uploads them. as for me.... when dearie saw the one that i wanted, she was like... "wah so gang ho" what the hell is gang ho man... haha... its soooooo nice that i still cant get my eyes off it. time to time i'll go to the mirror and take a glimpse. haha. while we were lying down at the beach, this group of indian aunties were sitting behind us. so when i turned my back to them, dearie noticed their jaws dropped revealing their sets of white teeth. haha. so funny. i turned and looked at them and they were still staring lo. how hilarious was that man.
i know i once said that im not going to spend money shopping for this gss. i failed myself. argh its all dearie's fault. i just couldnt stop myself from all the ever so tempting deals. i bought a bead belt, a necklace, 2 pairs of earings, a red hairband to complement my red hair, and a solid green pinky shoe. my gosh. if you notice anything at all.... its so not me to buy accessories! and i spend almost $20 on them!!! sob sob sob. nevertheless i had a fun time shopping with that bitch who caused me to be a broke woman.
oh... saw this baby at mango... my my my.. i fell totally in love with her. even before we met, i was already very attracted to her(i knew i love her before i met her). saw photos of her everywhere i go. so finally we met in suntec mango.... she's everything i wanted. she's so fucking gorgeous that i could hardly pull my eyes away from her. i just wouldnt stop carassing her. oh my... there's nothing on earth that i want more than her. she completes me.
$175.
i'll get her next month.
on the other hand, this girl, aya, wow... she's unbelievably good looking. ok not THAT good looking. but i think she has a high chance of winning. at least she's not a bimbo. she has the figure, the face and the personality too. i think i heard her saying that she's from the national women soccer team. how cool.
then there's this big neh neh. omg. she's freaking huge that this girl, daphne, behind us kept saying, "fuck! fuck! how can they have such huge boobs." haha. let me tell you how gigantic they were. i think they can squash your head and suffocate you. haha. nah i'm just exagerating. but during the swim wear parade, i think her breasts are so huge that she cant wear the normal triangular bikini cos it will not be able to give her the support if she had worn that. so she had to put on the tube kind. but when she was walking down the walkway, it was so obvious that her boobs were jiggling with each step that she took. know why? she wore a size smaller. when she reached the front stage and made a turn, my gosh! below the tube, part of her boobs were out. and ya... of cos jingling too. i dont think she purposely chose a smaller swim suit. it was really awful. ppl like us standing in front were laughing and pointing.... i mean why would you want that sort of attention rite? i mean... ya big boobs are great. attractive and seductive... (of cos they have to be rite?) but make sure you choose the right bikini and be able to wear it off... know what i mean? there's this other section whereby they had to parade some casual wear, this girl was really hot. cos she wore this bright bra inside and some sort of a jacket over it... not zipping the whole thing up.. revealing the bra and of cos her cleavage... i thought that was hot. even the butch behind me thought so too. see what i mean? you really need to get the right size of bikini and the right cut.
then this other pathetic girl... sigh. her name is serene. if im not wrong she's still having zero vote now. cant walk cant dance cant do a thing. the worst thing was that she seemed to have no friends to support her. poor thing. and ya... she wore this pair of huge heels that she coudnt walk properly down the walkway... she looked like a duckling wobbling her way lah. aiyo....
done with the bitching thing....
i'm fucking excited that i have a hand size tattoo on my back. wuahahahahaha... dearie chose a nice little butterfly... or rather i was the one who chose it for her. told her not to go for those normal looking one... this butterfly is a bit different. its slightly tilted to one side... i'll post up the photos once dearie uploads them. as for me.... when dearie saw the one that i wanted, she was like... "wah so gang ho" what the hell is gang ho man... haha... its soooooo nice that i still cant get my eyes off it. time to time i'll go to the mirror and take a glimpse. haha. while we were lying down at the beach, this group of indian aunties were sitting behind us. so when i turned my back to them, dearie noticed their jaws dropped revealing their sets of white teeth. haha. so funny. i turned and looked at them and they were still staring lo. how hilarious was that man.
i know i once said that im not going to spend money shopping for this gss. i failed myself. argh its all dearie's fault. i just couldnt stop myself from all the ever so tempting deals. i bought a bead belt, a necklace, 2 pairs of earings, a red hairband to complement my red hair, and a solid green pinky shoe. my gosh. if you notice anything at all.... its so not me to buy accessories! and i spend almost $20 on them!!! sob sob sob. nevertheless i had a fun time shopping with that bitch who caused me to be a broke woman.
oh... saw this baby at mango... my my my.. i fell totally in love with her. even before we met, i was already very attracted to her(i knew i love her before i met her). saw photos of her everywhere i go. so finally we met in suntec mango.... she's everything i wanted. she's so fucking gorgeous that i could hardly pull my eyes away from her. i just wouldnt stop carassing her. oh my... there's nothing on earth that i want more than her. she completes me.
$175.
i'll get her next month.
Friday, June 09, 2006
9th June 06, Friday 8:08pm
have you ever sat down by yourself, trying to find peace within you while your mind constantly had wild and random thoughts? peace simply seemed to be an unfamiliar word to you. after a long while of struggling, your concentration led you to another level. no matter what was going on in the surrounding or how noisy it was, you wouldnt notice. cos you were too deep in thoughts, too caught up thinking what had happened in your life.
then you realised life is just full of ironies and contradictions.
"yes i understand that. but..."
"i want to get my honours, but im too distracted.."
"i want to love but i'm too afraid..."
"i hate him" (but in fact you are like him)
"i'm so depressed" (but what do you know about depression)
"i wanna cut myself" (but when you see the knife you turn jelly-like)
"i want a simple life" (ya with gucci prada porche landed property hopefully i'm a star or a CEO)
then you started to question yourself would life be different if you had been brought up differently. why? why asked yourself something that you will never be able to get an answer. but yet... there was this part in you that was so eager to explore that possibility.
would i? perhaps.
would they have been different? maybe. if they were brought up in a different way too.
but they were not. they are who they are.
people will always think that they are right. i am guilty of that too. 24/7. but i always think that its ok if after the whole incident, you reflect and learn. sound easy isnt it? but trust me, it takes quite sometime for people to learn or rather never learn. there are some people who would say, "ya.. i did. i reflected. no i wasnt in the wrong... its still..." or (lagi best-->) "ya... i know i was wrong. hey but you know what if you hadnt done that, i wouldnt have done this.." dont you think its so sickening? humans err so much that i'm beginning to think that there's not a day in their life that they will not do the wrong things. pardon me for using so many negative words in a long sentence. can be confusing.
i wish i'm a magnanimous person. that i can forgive and forget. sad to say i'm not one. sometimes people just dont know how much they are hurting you because deep inside them, they've been hurt or are feeling as hurt as you are. i try to convince myself that its just how they are being brought up. in a too traditional way where they learn the traditional moral values. i'm not too sure whether its the right words to use but well i'm sure you understand what i'm trying to say. as for me, i went through the westernised education system. if one party holds one's value in life too strongly, too rigid to change, then conflicts arise. if one is not receptive enough to adapt, to change with the flow then one is bound to face challenges. if you hold on to your value, do not change and still think that you are right no matter how much the world has changed (your set of values no longer hold as much value as you think they do)... then you are just going to be cut off. is that too difficult to understand?
i have given in but you hold your pride so high that you do not want to recipocrate, then what am i supposed to do? to say sorry everyday? to beg for your forgiveness simply because according to the old values i am supposed to? how right it is to make someone suffer every single day without having to feel the slightest bit of guilt at all? how right it is to shun someone away when that someone loves you so much? is pride so important to you that losing it will kill you?
or perhaps this is my punishment for always thinking that my hatred has always been justified. that i am so right about my decision to hate all these years. have you not seen the biggest irony of my life? that i have always been so sure that all this while i am not wrong. that i will not forgive. that i will not tolerate his irritating voice and action. for doing so would mean that i have made the biggest mistake. that my pride would be thrown to drain. my pride... the only thing that i am left with in this little square box which is filled with so much unhappiness. i would rather risk losing you than to lose my pride. i choose to be in this state where i will never understand the true meaning of family.
my hatred.. so strong that it defines me.
i finally understand.
then you realised life is just full of ironies and contradictions.
"yes i understand that. but..."
"i want to get my honours, but im too distracted.."
"i want to love but i'm too afraid..."
"i hate him" (but in fact you are like him)
"i'm so depressed" (but what do you know about depression)
"i wanna cut myself" (but when you see the knife you turn jelly-like)
"i want a simple life" (ya with gucci prada porche landed property hopefully i'm a star or a CEO)
then you started to question yourself would life be different if you had been brought up differently. why? why asked yourself something that you will never be able to get an answer. but yet... there was this part in you that was so eager to explore that possibility.
would i? perhaps.
would they have been different? maybe. if they were brought up in a different way too.
but they were not. they are who they are.
people will always think that they are right. i am guilty of that too. 24/7. but i always think that its ok if after the whole incident, you reflect and learn. sound easy isnt it? but trust me, it takes quite sometime for people to learn or rather never learn. there are some people who would say, "ya.. i did. i reflected. no i wasnt in the wrong... its still..." or (lagi best-->) "ya... i know i was wrong. hey but you know what if you hadnt done that, i wouldnt have done this.." dont you think its so sickening? humans err so much that i'm beginning to think that there's not a day in their life that they will not do the wrong things. pardon me for using so many negative words in a long sentence. can be confusing.
i wish i'm a magnanimous person. that i can forgive and forget. sad to say i'm not one. sometimes people just dont know how much they are hurting you because deep inside them, they've been hurt or are feeling as hurt as you are. i try to convince myself that its just how they are being brought up. in a too traditional way where they learn the traditional moral values. i'm not too sure whether its the right words to use but well i'm sure you understand what i'm trying to say. as for me, i went through the westernised education system. if one party holds one's value in life too strongly, too rigid to change, then conflicts arise. if one is not receptive enough to adapt, to change with the flow then one is bound to face challenges. if you hold on to your value, do not change and still think that you are right no matter how much the world has changed (your set of values no longer hold as much value as you think they do)... then you are just going to be cut off. is that too difficult to understand?
i have given in but you hold your pride so high that you do not want to recipocrate, then what am i supposed to do? to say sorry everyday? to beg for your forgiveness simply because according to the old values i am supposed to? how right it is to make someone suffer every single day without having to feel the slightest bit of guilt at all? how right it is to shun someone away when that someone loves you so much? is pride so important to you that losing it will kill you?
or perhaps this is my punishment for always thinking that my hatred has always been justified. that i am so right about my decision to hate all these years. have you not seen the biggest irony of my life? that i have always been so sure that all this while i am not wrong. that i will not forgive. that i will not tolerate his irritating voice and action. for doing so would mean that i have made the biggest mistake. that my pride would be thrown to drain. my pride... the only thing that i am left with in this little square box which is filled with so much unhappiness. i would rather risk losing you than to lose my pride. i choose to be in this state where i will never understand the true meaning of family.
my hatred.. so strong that it defines me.
i finally understand.
Tuesday, June 06, 2006
6th June 06, Tuesday 11:04pm
guess what? its thumper nite and i'm at home blogging. well i've got good reason for not showing my face there. cos femme quest preview is on thursday at zouk. haha... not like i'm gonna enjoy myself much... i mean... having to work the next day is one thing. not being able to go with her is another. too bad she's in korea, yet again. argh. anyway, having the company of dearie n fia fia is good enough. speaking of femme quest, 8 out of 9 contestants sucks like hell... and guess what? one of the yucky sucky one is my friend's friend.... ewwwwwwww... what's more gross is one of the girl is freaking 26 years old (is girl the right word to use?). so fucking old already still wanna join this kinda pageant. well then again, i figure that it's because the age limit for msu is 25. that's why she turned to femme quest... if you're wondering why didnt she sign up for fhm... oh well that's simple. she doesnt have the body lah (not like somebody whose name starts with J).
but of cos... there's this chio one lo... so chio so attractive that i have my eyes glued onto her pics... omg! i'm there on thurs just to see her in real person. i heard that she's either sza's girlfriend or amelia's ex. i donno lah. both of their gf/ex are pearlyn 18yrs old. hey... maybe we're talking about the same girl. who knows.
prof chen, my pa supervisor, went to visit me and shu en this afternoon. oh my... she's damn motherly!!! am so greatful that i have her as my supervisor. she's all out to help shu en with her probs... and she gave me advice to my report. and the way she speaks... something about the way she speaks awed me. oh she bought us drinks haha. ok lah just drinks lah. come on man... tell me which of your supervisors have lunch with you lah?! i hope she's impressed with my performance. after all.. byron, my gm, is happy with my work and attitude (how can he not when i knock off at 7 instead of 6, sometimes i leave even later than tat. the record is 930). and erm... i'm seriously thinking of extending... and prof chen said i might wanna consider asking them to pay me part timer fee instead of that pitiful 600. so dearie, if you're thinking that your 10 weeks is long... mine is 13 weeks. haha.. actually longer.. my launch party is on 2nd of september... which means that i might be going back when school reopens. prof chen thinks its good too... cos that way i can see the running of my programme. its always good to start smth and end that by yourself.
oh well dearie since you said that i dont blog often, here's a little smth to remind you of our silly conversation... after you alighted at lake side.. i continued thinking of the various ways that someone would ask another to be his/her gf/bf... haha damn funny...
the normal, mundane, cliche and most often use (by guys, generally)
"will you be my girlfriend?"
doesnt it sound familiar? like will you marry me? omg... ewww..
then the one that i came out with:
hokkien: "eh... zuo wah eh lao ho bo?"
cool right?! hahaha... dearie laughed like mad lah when she heard me saying this.
then the other one... the one that i wanted to use on justina but i didnt lah.. (argh.. so wasted)
"be my bitch alright?"
not really tat cool... nonetheless 26 is "she's my bitch day"
so what other ways to ask the same question...
"i want you to be my baby.. will you?"
"i wanna take care of you...allow me to?"
the more innovative one would be...
"i want to be the sole person who has the right to fuck you and only you..."
ok that's not very lovey dovey... in fact the girl might just slap the guy...
hmmmm... this will do:
"i donno what's going on with me lah... i'm just confused... blah blah blah... all i want is to be with you...."
"(silent)(silent) you know what? i wanna be with you too..."
*claps* *claps* *claps* (audience tearing while ohhhing.... and then follow by "oh.. how sweet...")
tested n proven.
but of cos... there's this chio one lo... so chio so attractive that i have my eyes glued onto her pics... omg! i'm there on thurs just to see her in real person. i heard that she's either sza's girlfriend or amelia's ex. i donno lah. both of their gf/ex are pearlyn 18yrs old. hey... maybe we're talking about the same girl. who knows.
prof chen, my pa supervisor, went to visit me and shu en this afternoon. oh my... she's damn motherly!!! am so greatful that i have her as my supervisor. she's all out to help shu en with her probs... and she gave me advice to my report. and the way she speaks... something about the way she speaks awed me. oh she bought us drinks haha. ok lah just drinks lah. come on man... tell me which of your supervisors have lunch with you lah?! i hope she's impressed with my performance. after all.. byron, my gm, is happy with my work and attitude (how can he not when i knock off at 7 instead of 6, sometimes i leave even later than tat. the record is 930). and erm... i'm seriously thinking of extending... and prof chen said i might wanna consider asking them to pay me part timer fee instead of that pitiful 600. so dearie, if you're thinking that your 10 weeks is long... mine is 13 weeks. haha.. actually longer.. my launch party is on 2nd of september... which means that i might be going back when school reopens. prof chen thinks its good too... cos that way i can see the running of my programme. its always good to start smth and end that by yourself.
oh well dearie since you said that i dont blog often, here's a little smth to remind you of our silly conversation... after you alighted at lake side.. i continued thinking of the various ways that someone would ask another to be his/her gf/bf... haha damn funny...
the normal, mundane, cliche and most often use (by guys, generally)
"will you be my girlfriend?"
doesnt it sound familiar? like will you marry me? omg... ewww..
then the one that i came out with:
hokkien: "eh... zuo wah eh lao ho bo?"
cool right?! hahaha... dearie laughed like mad lah when she heard me saying this.
then the other one... the one that i wanted to use on justina but i didnt lah.. (argh.. so wasted)
"be my bitch alright?"
not really tat cool... nonetheless 26 is "she's my bitch day"
so what other ways to ask the same question...
"i want you to be my baby.. will you?"
"i wanna take care of you...allow me to?"
the more innovative one would be...
"i want to be the sole person who has the right to fuck you and only you..."
ok that's not very lovey dovey... in fact the girl might just slap the guy...
hmmmm... this will do:
"i donno what's going on with me lah... i'm just confused... blah blah blah... all i want is to be with you...."
"(silent)(silent) you know what? i wanna be with you too..."
*claps* *claps* *claps* (audience tearing while ohhhing.... and then follow by "oh.. how sweet...")
tested n proven.
Sunday, June 04, 2006
4th June 06, Sunday 4:15am
i'm damn frustrasted. ive got one whole season of l word yet i cant fucking watch most of it. simply its in a different format. argh. damn damn damn pissing!
anyway.... i bought a new bikini.
and saw this real cute girl at the pool tanning...
anyway.... i bought a new bikini.
and saw this real cute girl at the pool tanning...
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